Autism, at times, seems like there is so much to do. So much stress. Worry over making “the right” decisions. Sometimes it seems like the need to make important decisions doesn’t stop…school, therapies, babysitters, activities, socialization…what’s needed, what’s not needed…it can get exhausting, right?
School decisions are at the forefront right now. The pandemic changed a lot but in many ways, it’s given us clarity as to what’s most important to us. We know what we don’t want. And we can no longer avoid making a decision by our just go, go, go from one activity to the next.
So when making decisions, listen to your thoughts. When I make a big decision, many times my initial thoughts are:
- I want this but I’m afraid of…
- I want this but it’s never going to happen.
- I want this but I can’t be that lucky.
- I want this but life is never that easy.
A thought and a contradiction.
A thought and a contradiction.
I can recognize my patterns well now.
Then I get this uneasy feeling in my chest and I want to avoid making the decision. That’s when I know I have to get my mind free and clear before making the decision otherwise it’s a decision based in fear and I’ve learned that typically does not work out well for me.
So how do I drop that contradiction? I do a variety of things like meditation, reading, yoga, walking, driving, basically anything that puts me in appreciation of life. If I’m really wound up then I’ll do something like boxing or running. I know that I’ve dropped the contradiction when I can look around me and be excited for what’s to come and that’s when I make my decision.
Take a few moments now and reflect upon your past decisions. Ask yourself “How was I feeling when making that decision?” Were you rushed, annoyed, tired, angry, overwhelmed and then regretted the decision you made? Think about other decisions you’ve made and you’ve been happy with the results. Those were fun, weren’t they?
I’m sure you have lots of decisions to make right now about your child. Before you make a final decision ask yourself “What am I feeling right now?” If it’s not excitement about what’s to come in the future, take a few moments to clear your mind however, works best for you and be able to appreciate all that you see before you. When you start to get excited for the future, that’s the time to make your decision.
You will make the best decision with the information you have. I have no doubt.
